


a happy face or growing pains, it really doesn't seem to change

by Ignavia



Category: i aint putting this in the main tag
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-25
Updated: 2018-02-25
Packaged: 2019-03-23 22:55:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,310
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13798065
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ignavia/pseuds/Ignavia
Summary: oof we got that good backstory for michaelthis aint getting main tagged if youve found this and you arent from the discord then uh. hi?





	a happy face or growing pains, it really doesn't seem to change

**Author's Note:**

> hey this has got parent death and sort of probably some form of neglect

Michael never thought that he was  _ neglected _ , per se. Because it wasn’t like he went without the things needed to survive. He just…. Felt like maybe his parents should have been around more.

They loved him, of course, and the fist five years of his life was filled with fond memories (that he could remember, anyway.). They showered him with affection, sang soft songs to him before he slept, his mother taught him Tagalog, his father Spanish. It was a good life.

 

Then at five years old his mother had told him that she and his father would be going away for a bit. Michael, being a five year old, did not register the “a bit” part, focusing only on the idea that they were going away. He cried and begged them not to leave, but they told him they had to, and that they couldn’t bring Michael along because he was “too young”.    
He remembers crying to Jeremy about it, but Jeremy was also five years old and probably had no idea what was happening. 

 

Michael thinks it would have been better if not for the fact that he was basically left alone everyday when he wasn’t at kindergarten. His neighbours would check in on him every 4 hours or so, giving him food and whatever he needed, but would promptly leave. They did what they had to, nothing more. Thinking back, Michael would liken it to how you would have a neighbour check on a pet while on holiday. That was kind of a concerning thing. 

 

He remembers having nightmares, waking up in tears and calling for someone to help. But, of course, there was nobody there. He didn’t have any means of going to Jeremy, either, because he didn’t know the way to his house (the front door was also locked) and he couldn't call Jeremy because five year olds don’t know how to use phones. So he just lay there, whimpering. 

 

His parents would return home with smiles and gifts, showering him in the love and affection he had missed out on. Then, just two weeks later, they’d be gone again. It was really quite tiring. 

 

At seven years old, Michael had his first panic attack. It was terrifying and he couldn’t breathe and  _ god he needed Jeremy _ . So, because he still couldn’t use a phone (his parents never taught him that), he decided he had to go there himself. He didn’t get very far though, his sobbing mess of a self had made it part ways down the street before realizing he had no idea how to get there. One of his neighbours had found him, then. Michael asked her to take him to Jeremy, but she didn’t know who Jeremy was (Michael thought that it was ridiculous, because everyone should know who Jeremy is because Michael thinks Jeremy is the best person in the world).   
Instead, she takes him home, tucking him into bed with a glass of milk - because all child problems can be solved with a glass of calcium. He’s extra clingy to Jeremy the next day.

 

Michael had highlights every year, though. A week during the summer, his parents would take him to the Philippines where he would stay with his Lola. She, in his opinion, was the second greatest person in the world (Next to Jeremy). 

This was probably in part to do with the way she’d give him sweets and such because as everyone knows, children can be bribed with treats. As he got older, he genuinely just enjoyed her company. She was kind and gentle and always gave him the attention he’d missed out on for the majority of his life. That didn’t mean she never gave him gifts still, though. In fact, she was the one who gave him his headphones. She’d laughed, giving them and telling him it was so he could enjoy his music without driving his parents up the wall. Michael loved them.    
Everytime the week was up, she’d send him home with a bag of traditional Filipino sweets that he absolutely adored. They were his favourite and he’d always make sure to share them with Jeremy once he got home because Jeremy deserved to experience it too.

 

At the age of twelve, Michael proudly presented a mobile phone to Jeremy. He excitedly spoke about how his parents had given it to him - most likely so he could contact them - but “Oh my god Jeremy now we can talk to each other while we’re apart!”. He hadn’t really considered the fact that Jeremy might not have a phone himself, too caught up in the excitement. He could get Jeremy’s home phone number anyway.

 

At thirteen, Michael left for his annual trip to the Philippines to see his Lola. Things went as usual, he enjoyed her company, she sent him home with the bag of sweets. It was good and he was already looking forward to the next year. Except things didn’t go that way.

Not a week after returning home was he suddenly on a fight back. They’d received a call - something was wrong. Something was really wrong. He found himself in a hospital, by his Lola’s side, whimpering and wailing. She’d gave him a soft smile, telling him that things would be okay. So thirteen year old Michael held her to that, convincing himself that yes, yes everything would be okay and she’d be fine. He made sure to visit everyday while they were there, telling her about his day, about Jeremy and about any new music he’d found (“Oh! And my aunt Sarah showed me Bob Marley songs and they’re really good! Want to hear some?”).

But, as it turns out, things didn’t get better. Because after only four days of visiting, of sitting by her bedside and telling her about his school and classes and anything he could, things took a turn for the worse. He doesn’t really remember much, just suddenly there was a lot of doctors, a lot of loud voices and he was being ushered out of the room. He remembers crying out, begging them to let him in and see her because  _ everything was fine _ . But then Michael’s parents were sat with him, pulling him into their arms. His mom was crying, his dad whispering softly to the two of them. Michael doesn’t know what he’s saying. He can’t focus. 

 

He returns home not long after. He doesn’t tell Jeremy about what happened, putting up the bright smile he was always known to carry. Michael doesn’t think he can talk about it, so he doesn’t. He carried on as though it was just another visit, an impromptu visit that didn’t end in any sort of tragedy. He didn’t bring back any sweets this time.

 

At age 17, his parents are gone. Forever. They aren’t coming home this time. Michael is almost amazed at how much it affected him considering their absence for the majority of his life, but then he thinks back to when they were home and he knows exactly why. Because, yeah, maybe they weren’t always there. Maybe they could have done more. Should have. But they loved him. They loved him so much and now they were gone. 

 

He sits in front of two stones, showing the ring on his finger with a wide grin. There are tears in his eyes, but he’s smiling. The stones, of course, do not respond. But Michael talks anyway, like he did with his Lola, he tells them about how he’s doing, about the engagement, about his day. He barely notices the tears falling as he finishes talking. He doesn’t move for the moment, just sitting there, reading the inscriptions. The sun is setting, so Michael finally pushes himself up from where he was sitting, bidding the stones goodbye before finally leaving. 

  
/ **We’ve got work to do, Michael.** /


End file.
